There is a habit of comparing yourself to others. You compare your achievements with the success of others, your kid’s abilities with other children’s skills, even your outfit. You always compare, evaluate, judge without asking yourself a question: Is it good?
The habit of comparing yourself to others started in your childhood, when parents compared you to good and polite kids and now in adulthood you may see the results.
One of the main reasons why you compare yourself with others is your ego that wants to hear the notes of approval or envy. You want your colleagues, friends or neighbors to talk about you and your success. And you feel comfortable when they praise or envy you, which is preventing you from being truly happy and grow as a person.
If you constantly compare your life with others, be aware that there will always be more successful or lucky people, and this will not only spoil your mood, but will also affect your self-esteem.
Your feelings and mood depend on other people’s opinions and your whole life becomes a pursuit. It’s bad when you don’t have enough money for a new car. Everything is fine when you finally bought it. And again it’s bad when a neighbor buys a car better than yours. Of course, the car is an allegory, it can be your job, woman, money, house, etc., the meaning remains the same – you can’t be happy no matter what, you depend on others.
How to stop comparing yourself to others
1. Don’t even think about comparing yourself to others
Analyze your thoughts as your actions depend on them and your life in general depends on your actions. This means that everything starts within your mind, so watch your thoughts.
2. Don’t let your friends (colleagues, relatives) compare you with others
We are all unique, even our fingerprints are unique, so what can we say about the way of thinking, worldview, knowledge, etc. Try to realize it and tell your friends about it when they compare you with someone else.
3. Nobody’s perfect
Remind yourself about this more often and it will be much easier for you to overcome this bad habit. Remember also that every person has their own talent.
4. Set your goals
Those who don’t know what they want greatly depend on the public opinion. Any person’s goal seems attractive to you, you try to make it yours, but nothing happens. However, this is not your goal and not your way. Look for your goals and dreams, move in this direction and then you will succeed.
5. Get rid of fear of being misunderstood
For example, start to express your opinion or ideas in the presence of others and don’t remain silent as always. The first time is always the most difficult but the feeling of discomfort is normal. This feeling will pass quickly, if you don’t stop after the first time.
This is called to step out of your comfort zone. After this you will realize that people don’t think of you as often as it may seem, they have lots of their own problems.
6. Learn not to respond to any positive or negative comments
They are interrelated, because if you don’t respond to the positive comments, you won’t worry about the negative ones.
7. Compare yourself only to yourself
Compare your past and prensent state, what you’ve managed to achieve, how you’ve improved yourself, what you’ve managed to do to become closer to your dream, etc.
Learn to be yourself and move toward your goals, even if your understanding of happiness, success and purpose of life does not coincide with the public opinion. Don’t let the opinion of others be your priority.