Category Archives: Love & relationships

Ways to Heal an Angry Teenager

Living with an angry teen is never easy. It can be frustrating, hurtful, and very stressful. However, there are some specific things you can do to help him or her heal. Maintain positive communication, encourage healthy activities, and look into alternative placement if necessary.

Ways to heal an angry teenager

Ongoing Communication

Having an open and honest conversation with your teen is always helpful. Teens that are angry and display that anger in inappropriate ways often do so because they do not know how to communicate properly. Their brains are still developing at this point, and when combined with the hormonal changes there is clearly a biological reason for their actions.

However, talking with your teen about why they are angry can help them work through these issues. It is important that the communication be done correctly. Do not ask open ended questions. These do not result in honest conversations and it makes it easy for a teen to ignore you. Ask about specific parts of their day. Also engage in active listening. This way your teen will know that you are hearing them, and it also prompts them to elaborate on their thoughts. You want your teen to start working through their anger in a positive way.

Healthy Activities

Encourage your teen to burn off their anger with exercise or other activities. The right activity will greatly depend on the interests of your teen. Some examples are yoga, martial arts, sports, running, or cycling. The activity should help them express their feelings and burn off excess energy. A study done at Princeton University found that exercise really does make people feel better. It is one of the best ways to reduce anxiety and to improve mood. Regular exercise or other physical activities can help teens naturally feel better.

Alternative Options

If a teen has serious anger problems, violence and other destructive behavior may occur. If this is the case, you may want to look into alternative schools options. Professionals can step in and help teens manage their anger. Sometimes there are underlying issues like trauma or undiagnosed mental conditions that need professional intervention. Get the help you need to keep your family safe and to help your teen through this difficult time.

Teens need love and support to heal their anger. By following these steps you can help your teen learn how to manage their emotions. Do whatever is necessary to support your family and your angry teen.

How to Explain Disabilities to Your Child

There may come a point where you have to explain to your child why another child has a disability because of a friend, sibling or classmate they know has one. It can be a tricky thing to try to explain to a child but there are ways to make it easy for them to understand, here are a few ways to talk about it with your child:

How to explain disabilities to your child

Ask them questions: Ask your child a list of questions to get them thinking and to help them understand.

  • What is your classmate’s name? It’s a self-explanatory question; you want to avoid referring to their classmate as ‘the kid with ________’.
  • Does he/she do things differently? This question will show you what your child believes is different from themselves, here you can address this situation by stating that just because their classmate is acting different doesn’t mean they are not like each other.
  • How does it make you feel when you see them doing something differently? Finding out how your child reacts to their classmates actions will help you decide the best explanation and route to teach them. They are most often curious or confused.
  • What are the things you like about your classmate? This question will help them see past the differences and allow your child to focus on the common interests they share.

Break it down: Don’t be afraid to use drawings, diagrams, analogies or simple examples when it comes to explaining what the actual meaning behind their differences and disabilities. Keep it basic with phrases like, example: ‘Autism is something you are born with it, some people have it some don’t’, or ‘Classmate’s Name, has the same brain as you but it works differently from yours’ and etc.

Keep it simple and short: This conversation does not need to be long because it can overwhelm your child. Keep it short and informative. Make it a casual conversation that teaches them what they need to know and answers their questions. Keep it positive and your child will be positive.

Reacting: Children are not naturally mean or hateful beings, so their first reaction to a child with a disability is curiosity and then confusion. Sometimes a curious and confused child may not know how to deal with their feelings and can react in negative ways. Your goal as an adult is to teach them that it is okay to be curious and confused but that their reactions should be gentle and kind. Your child needs to know that there is no reason to treat their classmate differently and that they are just like themselves.

Prepare for questions: Children are curious and always seeking knowledge, they want an answer and will ask many questions to get them. Prepare for questions after the conversation and to follow days or even weeks later. Always be open and willing to listen to their questions.

You may not deliver the talk as smoothly as you want and your child may not understand it right away but the point is that you have the talk. Keep it simple and light, answer questions they have and teach them that their classmate is no different than they are and should not be treated differently. For more information you can reach out to the teacher or parent of the classmate for help.

True Secrets of a Happy Family

Family is the most important thing in everyone’s life. Most people dream of a happy family, but not everyone knows the secrets of a happy family, which can help to improve relationship within the family. So what are these secrets of a happy family?

Family happiness secrets

In fact, everything is very simple. It’s good to have such a tradition to have dinner together. Often many families eat when they want. The family should have dinner together, after all during a dinner you can discuss all the problems and in general such tradition will strengthen your relationship within a family.

I bet that your spouse will be glad to hear how much you love them. So why not please the loved ones and say once again about your love? However, simple words are not enough. Of course, don’t make gifts too often as it won’t be interesting. Sometimes it’s enough just to leave a romantic note, send a beautiful card or an email.

Don’t forget about your kids, they are the most sensitive to your attention. Buy a toy for your kid or some candies. It may seem that all this is too much, but this is exactly how a baby can make sure that his mum and dad love him, and not for something, but in spite of everything. Kind words, gentle touch, a warm smile – all these things needn’t be neglected, because all this will create a good and happy atmosphere in the house.

Family should have its own traditions. You can make an agreement that for example on Sundays you go out to have some fun and relax. You can go to the theater, cinema or a zoo. It may be just shopping with a family. Family traditions can strengthen your relationship.

And of course how can you imagine a happy family without a pet. Pets are able to raise your mood, they surround the family with love and affection, creating a cozy home atmosphere.

At the last but not least, don’t forget also about respect and understanding within your family. All family members should share household duties. When everyone in the family knows their duties, there is no irritation.

But when you feel irritation or anger try to remember that these are people that you love most of all. So, relax, be happy and make your family happy either.

The Real Reason to Trust Your Partner

You want to trust…but you just can’t.
There are a lot of you out there who have severe trust issues and this in turn sabotages your relationships. You’re not able to trust anyone you’re with no matter how hard you try. It’s an awful situation: you want to be with somebody, but at the same time you don’t want to be with that person because you just don’t trust them.

Several reasons may exist as to why you don’t trust someone. Perhaps you were hurt in the past and it’s a challenge to do so again. Or you know that your current partner cheated in previous relationships and you’re terrified they’ll do it to you.

I used to be the same way. Sad, but true.
I myself used to be with a woman who had cheated on a few of her long-term boyfriends. We knew a lot about each other’s pasts and this was something she had confessed to me.

It was better for me not to have known.

Even though I loved her I was perpetually afraid that she was going to cheat on me. Suspicion was driving me crazy. I was torturing myself with images of her sleeping with some other guy. When she told me she was going out with girlfriends I would start to think she was going to meet another man instead.

I walked around miserable and unhappy. I was in the grip of a mental torture I couldn’t escape. I felt as though I was suffocating.

I tried everything: praying to God, talking with friends, trying to squash the sinister thoughts right out of my head. I even considered going to a psychologist, but I didn’t do it because I didn’t have money for that at the time.

Of course, my relationship was hell. Never having cheated myself on anyone, I didn’t understand why someone would do that. I became self-righteous and began angrily reprimanding my partner. I acted as though she had cheated on me instead of her exes.

I was crazy jealous too. I always feared that she would like another guy, that she would leave me for someone else.

When she went on business trips it was the worst. I was in agony, depressed and anxious as I imagined her having sex with some colleague in a hotel far away from me.

Lack of trust rips people apart
As was to be expected, my jealousy and insane moods was ripping us apart. I murdered a lot of beautiful things in our relationship but I just couldn’t control myself. One really low point was when I was struggling to kill my emotions for her so that I would be indifferent. I thought that emotional indifference would be more preferable to the raging torture I was suffering.

Eventually she and I became distant. In the end I quit the relationship. For me it was a kind of emotional euthanasia. I felt immense relief that I no longer had to worry about her cheating on me. It was pure bliss.

Currently I’m with a woman who I feel I can trust. I’m at peace finally. It’s like being on a permanent holiday. I’m overjoyed that the demons tearing my mind in my previous relationship haven’t reappeared in the new one.

And you know what? After I got together with my current partner, my ex confessed to me that she had, in fact, cheated on me.

Trust for your own sake
The lesson to learn here is that all my crazed maniacal behavior didn’t stop my ex from cheating on me. In fact, maybe I drove her to it. It doesn’t matter anymore.

But what you must realize is that you should trust someone for your own sake. Lack of trust and never ending vigilance won’t stop someone from cheating on you.

The reason why you should trust your partner is because you want peace in your own mind. Make a choice to trust your partner and to treat him/her as well as you can. Love that person to your utmost capacity. If you do eventually discover that your partner has been sleeping with someone else, then deal with that from the moment it happens. Don’t be afraid of things that haven’t happened yet. Especially when there are no clues or hints.

That is the true importance of trust within a relationship. It’s something we do for ourselves, and to a certain extent, the sake of the relationship. Once you have the delicious peace of mind that naturally accompanies trust, then that will benefit the relationship greatly. It could even go a long way in preventing what you’re most afraid of.

Today I finally realize the importance of trust. I know that whether my partner proves to be trustworthy or not is beside the point. A relationship simply can’t function well when there’s no trust on either side, no matter what calamities may occur in the future.

Every new relationship is a risk. You’re making an emotional investment instead of a financial one. If you’re willing to believe in the growth potential of some start-up company, then surely you can believe in a single human being.

It’s normal not to trust your enemy. Your partner is not supposed to be your enemy but a good friend. Friends are supposed to trust each other. It’s the essence behind relationships, what holds them up and allows them to flourish.